What better way to celebrate April Fools Day (besides creating inventive ways of making all your friends look stupid) than to take a look now at the world’s biggest batch of genuine fools. Here’s my personal list:
9. Speedo wearers. This one is universal and has remained on the list ever since the weenie bikini was invented. Face it guys, wearing this little number is never a good idea;
8. Rick Santorum. This poor man is killing himself running for president when everyone (probably even members of his immediate family) know he’s never gonna win. He’d be wise to retire the lame sweater vests and get a real job;
7. Indiana High School Athletic Association. This one is very personal to me since everyone knows I’m a HUGE basketball fan. Evidently, these geniuses voted to get rid of basketball for smaller schools in the state. Sadly, now we can only watch the movie, Hoosiers, to see what a real statewide basketball tournament should look like. Now we’ll just have to travel across the river to a state where they’re smart enough to keep the game intact. Go Kentucky Wildcats in the NCAA Final Four Tournament!
6. Toronto City Council. This little band of crusty Canucks keeps trying to stick it to Mayor Rob Ford. When they couldn’t remove him, they tried to take away most of his power. This just motivated Ford more and put most of the council members at risk of losing their own jobs. Way to put the red cape in front of the bull, eh?
5. New Jersey Democrats. Here’s a news flash to Dawn Zimmer. Nobody cares about your diary. And to Pile on Pallone? Your whining about Governor Chris Christie is just annoying. The rest of the country really doesn’t care about your state’s traffic problems and the incessant attacks on Governor Christie just make him bigger and badder. Nice try but it ain’t working;
4. Piers Morgan. This poor guy doesn’t get that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Maybe when his ratings started going down the toilet, he should have stopped and considered why. Going on anti-gun rants every week wasn’t such a good idea. Don’t you agree, Piers?
3. Unionized NCAA Players. Way to ruin the game, guys. Unions never work. If you want to get paid, go pro. Have some pride and respect for the game;
2. Obama. In my opinion, he’s the worst president in U.S. history. That’s no easy feat. He had to beat out Jimmy Carter, Warren G. Harding, and James Buchanan. Trust me, if you study history, you know that’s not easy. Here are the highlights—trying to give away the Internet, ObamaCare lies and website, Solyndra, IRS Scandal, Putin puttering, Benghazi . . . the list goes on and on; and
1. Bill de Blasio. In the New York City mayor’s short time in office, he’s managed to make a mockery of himself. I don’t know what’s worse—going after horses in Central Park, charter schools, or jaywalkers? It’s a tight contest particularly since he got caught jaywalking himself. Yesterday, he got booed at the Mets opening day game. This just proves New Yorkers don’t suffer fools for long especially when the fool wears a number six jersey, not even honoring a player from the hometown team. What a jack leg!
So there’s my list. I plan on spending the rest of the day personally adding friends and family members to the list, so if you see me coming today, I suggest you watch out (more than you usually do)!