Time for Scotland to Go Braveheart!

September 17th, 2014

Scotland has a long tradition of being brave and full of heart.

By contrast, England has a long tradition of taking other people’s land and ruling over them with an iron fist. History shows that the English are a pretty heartless bunch.

If you don’t believe me travel across the pond and visit the Tower of London. There you can tour rooms with torture chambers and stand on the very spot Anne Boleyn lost her head . . . literally.

Time for a little more British history?  Trek on over to Westminster Abbey where a certain Mary Queen of Scots is entombed right across a hallway from her cousin, Queen Elizabeth I.  If Mary had her way likely she wouldn’t want to spend eternity so close to the woman who put her in her grave by unceremoniously separating her head from the rest of her body.

Originally, I suspected this placement was yet another way for the English to make some big statement to the Scots that they were all together whether they like it or not, but I’ve since learned that Mary’s own son, James, decided to move his mother’s remains there when he became King of England. Evidently, he thought this was a good way to stick it to Elizabeth for putting his mother there in the first place. Before burial, he even had her head reattached to really irritate old Liz.

Good for him.

And it’s not just individuals who’ve been treated horribly, the British have a long and storied history of treating entire countries badly.  Don’t get me wrong. England hasn’t always been the evil empire, but they’ve behaved badly just enough times that they’ll never be forgiven by some of their victims.  That’s where Scotland comes in.

Too many times, Scotland has been treated like an ugly stepchild.  This is despite the fact that many of the greatest inventors, economists, authors, and actors to ever come out of the “United Kingdom” are Scottish!

As a proud descendant of Scottish immigrants, I would love nothing more than to see the Scottish ditch the Brits.  They’ll certainly get along fine without them.  First, they have North Sea oil so a steady revenue stream is likely.  They also have Scotch, an export that will always be in demand.

All the United Kingdom’s nuclear weapons are housed in Scotland (a decision they’ll likely regret later—that’s like the U.S. putting everything in Texas).  Fortunately for the British, the presumed leaders of a future independent Scottish nation say they don’t want the nukes.  Personally, I think that’s a stupid move that the Scots will later regret.

The Scots are tough.  They eat beat bangers, mash, and haggis. You can’t be sissy and prissy to do that.  Sure they wear kilts, which on the surface seem a little girly, but then when you think about it, you have to be a pretty tough guy to pull that off proudly.  Besides, they carry a couple of knives under those skirts, so go ahead and tease them if you dare.

Why should Scotland be junior to anyone?  Second fiddle?  Forget it.  The English have no right to tell the Scots what to do.

In the spirit of Rob Roy and William Wallace, I say to my Scottish brethren to tell David Cameron to go to bloody Hell, especially after he copped the attitude that if they leave they can never come back.

Yeah, don’t worry, Old Chap.

You may think you sound tough now, but I guarantee you’ll be crying in your ale when the mighty Scots are gone.

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