9. Brexit! Nice to see the British get their act together and pull a thoroughly American move (took them long enough);
8. Rather than tease the Brits this year as I usually do, I will toast the fact that they followed our lead in seeking independence;
7. Obama’s administration is almost over! He’s the worst president in our history with many policies that are un-American. Fortunately, in a few months his name will be added to the history books along with other bad presidents like Andrew Johnson, Jimmy Carter, and James Buchanan.
6. Our beautiful country is so vast there really isn’t a reason to ever leave it. From Alaska to Alabama and New York to Nevada, seeing America never gets old;
5. We have so many guns that no one will ever be able to take over the country. Anyone who tries will certainly have a big fight on their hands;
4. It’s an absolute fact that the United States is the most coveted country in the world. Hillary and friends attack Donald Trump for nationalism, but hey, when you’re better than everyone else in the world what else can you say? Face it, no one is crossing the border illegally to get into Mexico or Morocco unless they’re lost. Everyone wants to be us;
3. Amnesty just got a serious punch in the nose in the United States Supreme Court confirming the longstanding idea that if you want to be an American, you have to work for it. It’s a privilege so don’t come here waving the Mexican flag and beating up Americans at rallies and expect us to give you anything, including citizenship. You don’t deserve it simply because you’re here;
2. Donald Trump—a patriot who will keep America as it should be. He’ll protect Americans and keep out enemies who hate our way of life; and
1. We have the best country in the world by far. No other country even comes close. Don’t agree? Then leave. Thank you military and all patriots this Fourth of July.
USA! USA! USA!