Dee Dee & Monica Take D.C.

November 30th, 2012

If you missed yesterday’s post, there is a good reason.  There wasn’t one.

The reason?

Dee Dee and I decended upon D.C. in hopes of helping save the country from the dreaded fiscal cliff. Unfortunately, it didn’t take five minutes here before we realized it was pretty hopeless.

We began our day by meeting with a Young Republican friend of ours who has made it big as a Member of Congress.

Our visit had a few interesting moments beginning with our entrance into the Capitol building.  While I breezed through without incident, Dee Dee’s eighteen inch fashionista boots caused the metal detector to flash and alarm resulting in her being subjected to the dreaded security wand at the hands of a less than friendly looking female guard.  Just when I thought we were in free and clear, another officer stopped us.

“Which one of you has the aerosal can?” he asked in a very stern voice.

“Not me,” I replied as quick as I could.

“I do,” Dee Dee answered, “It’s in my bag.”

“Well you can’t have it,” he ordered, “You’re going to have to throw it in the trash outside.”

“Seriously!” she answered angrily, “You’re going to take my hairspray?  That’s a brand new $20 can!”

The tension between the two caused my stomach to knot up.  Could this really be happening?  Were we going to get kicked out of the U.S. Capitol or worse yet get arrested over a can of hairspray?

“Miss, you are going to have to throw it away outside,” he ordered.

Thankfully, she followed his command but not without stomping around the corner and announcing to the waiting throng in the security line how much she hated the place. It was clear that she didn’t just lightly toss it in the trash either.  She threw it like a basketball bank shot with such force that we could all hear it inside.

This was not starting out well.

“Look Dee Dee, you can always get it out of the trash when we leave,” I offered as we walked up the hallway towards our friend’s office.

“You think so?” she asked.

“Oh sure,” I answered.  It wasn’t something I would personally do because I’m a huge germaphobe.  But that’s just me.

When we arrived at our friend’s office, he came out to greet us.

His first words to me?

“It’s great to see you!”

His first words to Dee Dee?

“Man, you’re killing me.  You can’t be saying that stuff on TV.”

Evidently, the “stuff” is a campaign Dee Dee decided to launch in support of our friend on television and the Internet. The problem?  While Dee Dee fully supports her campaign, our friend clearly doesn’t which is problematic since she thinks this would help him.  I personally feel that if you’re going to start such an effort, everyone needs to be onboard, especially the person you’re supporting.  It’s kind of like nominating the Pope for President.  First, he’s ineligible.  Second, he gives no indication that he’s interested in the job. Anyway, this is still a free country, so I support her right to speak her mind even when we disagree.

At the end of the meeting,  we took a couple of photos.  The Congressman and Dee Dee looked great.  I wasn’t so lucky. While I attribute it all on a bad camera angle and unfortunate wardrobe choice, I ended up looking like the “before” picture in a Jenny Craig campaign.

“Dee Dee, I don’t want to see this picture on Facebook,” the Congressman instructed.

“I’ll be sure she doesn’t do that,” I chimed in as if I have any control over the matter.

No sooner had we walked out of his office than Dee Dee turned to me and said, “He said Facebook.  He didn’t say anything about Twitter.”

“You can’t do that,” I told her.  “He asked you not to so you shouldn’t.”

So what happened?  She put it on Facebook AND Twitter.

When I found out, visions of Thelma and Louise swept over me.

After the meeting, we headed back outside and peaked in the trash can.

“Look!  It’s on top and wasn’t even touched!”  she said as she lifted out the can and put it in a bag in her purse.

As we move through our blogging experience together, I believe it will quickly become evident that never before have two more different personalities converged to come together in a joint effort since The Odd Couple.

We plan to meet again in D.C. soon.

Stay Tuned.



One Comment

  1. Posted Dec 04 2012 at 12:25 pm | Permalink

    Sounds pretty darn (yes, I’m keeping it clean) fun to me. So when’s the next trip to DC?